Sardar is Back

> Sardar is back !!!!!!! > > Manager asked sardar at an interview. > ”Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?” > Sardar replied: “P-O-S-T-B-O- X.” > > > One tourist from U.S.A. asked Sardar: > ”Any great man born in this village?” > Sardar: “No sir, only small Babies!!!” > > > When sardar was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver adjusted > the mirror. Sardar shouted, > "You are trying to see my wife? Sit behind. I will drive.” > > > Interviewer: “Just imagine you are on the 3rd floor, and it caught fire. > How > will you escape?” > Sardar: “It’s simple. I will stop my imagination!!!” > > > Sardar: “My mobile bill how much?” > Call centre girl: “Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status.” > Sardar: “Stupid, not CURRENT BILL, my MOBILE BILL.” > > > Sardar: “I think that girl is deaf.” > Friend: “How do you know?” > Sardar: “I told her that I Love her, but she said her chappals are new.” > > > Friend: “I got a brand new Ford IKON for my wife!” > Sardar: “Wow!!! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!!!” > > > Teacher: “Which is the oldest animal in world?” > Sardar: “ZEBRA.” > Teacher: “How?” > Sardar: “Because it is Black & White.” > > > Sardar attending an interview in Software Company. > Manager: “Do you know MS Office?” > Sardar: “If you give me the address I will go there sir.” > > > Sardar in airplane going 2 Bombay. While its landing he shouted: “Bombay > ... Bombay” > Air hostess said: "Be silent." > Sardar: "Ok... Ombay. Ombay" > > > Teacher: "What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA , RAM, GANDHI and BUDDHA?" > Sardar: "All are born on government holidays...!!!”

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A gud one

 

Until a child tells you what they are thinking, we can't even begin to imagine how their mind is working.... 
Little Zachary was doing very badly in math. 
His parents had tried everything...tutors, mentors, 
flash cards, special learning centers. 
In short, everything they could think of to help his math. 

Finally, in a last ditch effort, they took Zachary down and enrolled him In the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Zachary came home with a very serious look on his face. He didn't even kiss his mother hello.  Instead, he went straight to his room and started studying. 

Books and papers were spread out all over the room and little Zachary was hard at work. His mother was amazed. She called him down to dinner. 

To her shock, the minute he was done, he marched back to his room without a word, and in no time, he was back hitting the books as hard as before. 

This went on for some time, day after day, while the mother tried to understand what made all the difference. 

Finally, little Zachary brought home his report Card.. He quietly laid it on the table, went up to his room and hit the books. With great trepidation, His Mom looked at it and to her great surprise, Little Zachary got an 'A' in math.   She could no longer hold her curiosity.. She went to his room and said, 'Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?' Little Zachary looked at her and shook his head, no.. 'Well, then,' she replied, Was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms? WHAT WAS IT?' 

Little Zachary looked at her and said, 'Well, on the first day of school when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around.' 

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Management Decision

Dr.Kumaresh Krishnamoorthy Fellowship in Head and Neck Surgery (USA) Fellowship in Neurotology (USA)                     Senior Consultant,                                         Apollo Hospitals Bangalore, 560076, India

For Appts:               (91) - 80 - 26304351 Website      Facebook      Health Blog      Musings      My Journey   My Page         Pictures       Youtube

Once SONIA GANDHI, L.K. Advani and Laloo Prasad Yadav were travelling in an autorickshaw. They met with an accident and all three of them died. Yama Raja was waiting for this moment at the doorstep of death. He asks Mrs GANDHI and Advani to go to HEAVEN. But, for Laloo, Yama had already decided that he should be sent to HELL. Laloo is not at all happy with this decision. He asks Yama as to why this discrimination is being made. All the three of them had served the public. Similarly, all took bribes, all misused public positions, etc. Then why the differential treatment? He felt that there should be a formal test or an objective evaluation before a decision is made; and should not be just based on opinion or pre-conceived notions. Yama agrees to this and asks all the three of them to appear for an English test. Mrs GANDHI is asked to spell " INDIA " and she does it correctly. Advani is asked to spell " ENGLAND " and he too passes. It is Laloo's turn and he is asked to spell " CZECHOSLOVAKIA ". Laloo protests that he doesn't know English. He says this is not fair and that he was given a tough question and thus forced to fail with false intent. Yama then agrees to conduct a written test in Hindi (to give another chance assuming that Laloo should at least feel that Hindi would provide an equal platform for all three). Mrs GANDHI is asked to write "KUTTA BOLA BHOW BHOW". She writes it easily and passes. Advani is asked to write "BILLY BOLI MYAUN MYAUN". He too passes. Laloo is asked to write "BANDAR BOLA GURRRRRR....." Tough one. He fails again. Laloo is extremely unhappy. Having been a student of history (which the other two weren't),he now requested for all the 3 to be subjected to a test in history Yama says OK but this would be the last chance and that he would not take any more tests. Mrs GANDHI is asked: "When did India get Independence ?". She replied "1947" and passed. Advani is asked "How many people died during the independence struggle?". He gets nervous. Yama asked him to choose from 3 options: 100,000 or 200,000 or 300,000. Advani catches it and says 200,000 and passes. It's Laloo's turn now. ' ' ' Yama asks him to give the Name and Address of each of the 200,000 who died in the struggle. Laloo accepts defeat and agrees to go to HELL. Moral of the story: IF YOUR MANAGEMENT HAS DECIDED TO SCREW YOU, THERE IS NO ESCAPE.....  :-

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The Only Place in India where the prices remain constant irrespective of Inflation

Subject:  The Only Place in India where the prices remain constant irrespective of Inflation

 

The only place in India where food is cheap..... This is actual price list.     Tea Rs.1.00   - 200ML      Soup Rs.5.50  -- 350ml      Dal Rs.1.50 -- 50grams      Meals Rs.2.00  plate means with 200grams cooked rice      Chappathi Rs.1.00  150grams -2 pieces      Chicken Rs.24.50    300grams with one Chicken Piece included.      Dosa Rs.4.00  - 120 grams  sprinkled with refined Sunflower oil.      Veg Briyani Rs.8.00  - 300grams cooked with farm fresh vegetables.      Fish Rs.13.00 - 150 grams per piece cooked in Refined Sunflower oil. Fish from fresh water ponds.     These items are meant for "POOR PEOPLE" & is available at Indian Parliament Canteen. The Only Place in India where the prices remain constant irrespective of Inflation and No entry for outsiders within India. Citizens of Foreign Nationals can avail special discount. The salary of those poor people is Rs.80000 per Month!! PLUS HEFTY BONUS IN SCAMS....

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Thank you doctor

Hello Doctor.
Yes, am fine now .

I took the medications as prescribed by you.
There is a lot of difference from the previous visit.
I can now hear even the slightest sound around me.
As you told, I followed your methods & even did the 'steam-water method'.
Well, there was a nice difference when I did the latter... Now I can listen in stereo mode! Hehe...

I even went through your website and links... Very nice ... & informative too.

After reading your blog... I was like...'Ditto'... I am also very 'phobic'...
I do not like social gatherings (marriage receptions, get-together, team outings, extra-curricular activities which has a lot of people, crowded places, meeting people, ...... seems to be like Agoraphobia...even I hate going out, i.e., for example, if my father or mother gives me some errands to do the next or following day, I keep thinking about that all-day long... I get panic-attacks, sweating, my heart keeps beating loudly, mouth dries up, etc... Imagine this when I used be at 'school' !!! Especially the Bullies, teachers ... and then the usual peer pressure, marks, presentations, sport activites, debates.....

Well, I have tried every method to calm down in order to make myself, yes, 'compatible' and adapt to the real-world surrounding, but its of no use. Anyways, do I need medical attention or am I okay and can carry on without any problems? I know, I will make any doctor get confused & this would be 'one of a kind' case that they would come across ...
Again, am I alright Doctor?

I suffered a lot during this period & yes, also the college days :( ... even though I had the best parents support. Yes, I had everything I needed & was happy with that... But then even now am kind of .... very introvert, not good at talking or communicating in a smooth and effective manner, I also have this problem of forgetting things, ....I could go on...
I love reading blogs & newspapers, surfing the net, audio & video editing, riding & driving, listening to music, playing PC games, watching documentaries & action, animation, comedy, family & fantasy movies, ....work-outs,...

The reason why I wrote these things is that you will come to know of a very different, confused, funny, weird & unusual person ()...people do vary and have different things...they come from different backgrounds...have different stories,...etc...
You may find my mail stupid, childish & does not make any sense, but then... This is what I am .
I could keep writing ..... I am cutting short this 'messy & difficult-to-read' mail which may bore you :(
There is more, as am a gadget freak, hard-core gamer & a music lover of all genre...
And, maybe, the next time I'll make it more short...after all...this is an e-mail & not a blog.

I must say this - I feel more bold & positive when I read your blog...
Hats of to you, Doctor.
I hope you really help as many people as possible and that the right message is delivered to the right people at the right time.
I really appreciate all your efforts & spreading around your messages to people who really are in need of help...even during your busy & hectic schedule.
See, you indeed made a difference...I kind of feel light...You made my 'problems' feel so small...I became your fan!...Thx.
I just showed your website, links & video to my family members.

I need your blessings.

Yours Sincerely,
San.

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This is really a very interesting story. I hope you enjoy!

A wealthy man took his faithful pet
Dachshund dog . One day, the dachshund starts chasing
butterflies and before long the dachshund discovers that he is lost.
Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with
the obvious intention of having lunch. The dachshund thinks, "I'm in deep
trouble now! Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by and
immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the
approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dachshund
exclaims loudly,

"Boy, that was one delicious leopard. I wonder if there are any more around here."

Hearing this, the Leopard halts his attack in mid-stride, as a look of
terror comes over him, and slinks away into the trees.
"Whew," says the
leopard. "That was close. That dachshund nearly had me."

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby
tree figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection
from the leopard. So, off he goes. But the dachshund saw him heading after
the Leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up.
The monkey soon catches up with the Leopard, spills the beans and strikes a
deal for himself with the leopard. The leopard is furious at being made a
fool of and says,

"Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine."

Now the dachshund sees the leopard coming
with the monkey on his back and thinks "What am I going to do now?" But
instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers,
pretending he hasn't seen them yet.... and just when they get close enough to
hear, the dachshund says.......................

"Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off half an hour ago to bring me
another leopard."

Life consists not in holding good cards, but in playing those you hold well...................

Fellowship in Head and Neck Surgery (USA)
Fellowship in Neurotology (USA)

Senior Consultant
ENT, Head & Neck Surgery and Neurotology
Apollo Hospitals

Appts:                                 91-80-26304351
Phone:                               91--99002 36819

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